Are you a people pleaser?

Scientists have discovered that there are 4 ways in which the human body reacts to trauma - flight, fight, freeze, these three are already fairly well known, however in recent years a fourth response has come about and that is the "fawn response". 

Fawning refers to consistently abandoning your own needs in favour of others to avoid conflict, criticism or disapproval. Fawning is also called "to please and soothe"

This response is formed in childhood; the child is usually in an unsafe, unstable or abusive home environment that causes him or her a lot of stress and suffering, where the only way to be safe is to please others.

However, there is a downside to this, being a person who is constantly trying to get along with everyone and avoid conflict at all costs leads to a loss of boundaries, the boundaries for our well being. These serve to protect our energy. When can I allow myself to say yes and when is it too much? When does it turn against me and my behavior and energy go downhill in their own way as a result? That kind of person is kind of trapped unless they are aware of why they are behaving that way and what is actually going on. 

If you can find yourself in that description, great, because what was in the subconscious is suddenly perhaps conscious and therefore you no longer just react automatically but you begin to wonder how to get out of it. How to set a protective boundary, how to learn to say no, how to realise that I will survive the rejection and not commit to something I really don't want to do 🙂 .

If you continue in this behaviour, you are losing your precious energy and your light. The question is, is it worth it to you?

You may not be in a dangerous environment now, there is no need to continue this learned response. There is time to learn and respond with new and more beneficial behaviours 😉😃.

Mirka